Stalker

[megamedia]

Help? Any on air types had people that won't leave you alone? Waiting at your home..Sending you emails, calling you at work...all so they can have some sort of relationship with you( in their minds!)
I am reluctant to go through the court system because of being on air...although I believe a restraining order may be the only way. This has been on-going for several years. Management is aware of it and legal has been helpful.

Any help would be appreciated.

[kim jung il]

Have you ever have Media
http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2000/korea/story/leader/kim.dae.jung/link.kim.jong.il.jpg
...Stalk You?

[Pinkie]

Waiting at your home? Talk to the authorities about legal action. Pronto.

[ August 02, 2007, 08:43 PM: Message edited by: Pinkie ]

[talkinghead03]

just curious...why are you just taking action now if this has been going on for several years?

[Another side]

Management is aware of it and legal has been helpful?

And it's been going on several years?

You might want to reevaluate the contributions of management and legal.

[The Mockingbird]

You have a stalker, act immediately.

Begin the documentation process.

I can't stress this enough.

[anti-spam]

And move - NOW! If they're unbalanced enough (and waiting at your home is pretty unbalanced), no restraining order is going to stop them.

[Obewon]

Arm yourself, the graveyards are filled with the bodies of restraining order failures. Nobody will protect you except you

[Ferrycrossthemersey]

Contact the police...NOW!

And you might talk to a professional security person; try Gavin de Becker (gavindebecker.com). His firm is in Los Angeles, but he may have offices elsewhere. Even if he doesn't, it would be worth a phone consultation (have the station pick up the tab).

I can't stress this enough; act now.

In the meantime, move. Seriously.

[megamedia]

Thanks for the advice....It is an old girlfriend...5 years ago...A drunk, can't hold a job, daddy's rich....She has no life.
I didn't get a restraining order before because I didn't want to end up in court because of being on air...Have my dirty laundry aired.
It stopped for awhile...last year or so. I thought it would go away. Now, for some reason, she is back.
Anyone have a similar situation? How did you handle it?
Thanks for the input. I am collecting. Documenting.

[ISTHISTHINGON?]

Easy. If you're concerned about your safety...forget about being on air. Your 'dirty laundry' won't be washed if some crazy ex shoots you. Either file a report with police, or do nothing and quit talking yourself into thinking you're scared. If you were, you'd go to police....THAT'S what will save your "on air" status if you have to defend yourself. First one to file a complaint looks better in the public eye. Anything other than filing a report to put it on record is whining and making something out of nothing. Seriously....it's that simple. Good luck and file it.

[Newzie52]

Absolutely contact the police and be prepared to defend yourself if necessary. This is an all-too-common occurrence among on-air folks (though it being an old girlfriend is a little different.) Bottom line is, stalkers are unstable and unpredictable and you can't rely on just a restraining order. Though extreme, I would certainly consider a move while doing all possible to document, etc., now.

I've had stalkers of a sort, as well (letters, calls, etc.)but they were usually already locked up ;)

[Clever Login Name]

I'm having the same problem.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/37/Lauren_Jones_zzcclj4.jpg

It's like she's obsessed with me.

[megamedia]

Thanks..
Number one....filed a police report...with a witness with me..when she came by my home. I have 3 or 4 from 2003.
Can't move. Home owner. I realize restraining order is the way to go. I was hoping for another alternative. My ex-live in girlfriend had to get a restraining order against this woman...which she violated. I have just wanted to avoid court and any potential embarrassment from old emails-etc, etc when we were together briefly.
thanks.

[Another side]

You should have said it was an ex-girlfriend in the original post. It puts a different light on the term "stalker." You know her, you've been around her, it's not as desperate as your original post suggested. Now I understand your statement that you've been dealing with it "for years."

[Bandit '07]

Originally posted by megamedia:
Thanks..
Number one....filed a police report...with a witness with me..when she came by my home. I have 3 or 4 from 2003.
Can't move. Home owner. I realize restraining order is the way to go. I was hoping for another alternative. My ex-live in girlfriend had to get a restraining order against this woman...which she violated. I have just wanted to avoid court and any potential embarrassment from old emails-etc, etc when we were together briefly.
thanks.You have a very complicated life. Good luck with that.

[LittleBabyPuppy]

Sounds like you're in a sticky spot. And as a rule of thumb, NEVER put any kind of romantic letter in writing. It may come back to haunt you, as you state now.

Legal action might be the only way to go. I can't imagine this woman stopping on her own if it's been going on for years. I hope everything works out for you.

[s'news]

Originally posted by Clever Login Name:
I'm having the same problem.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/37/Lauren_Jones_zzcclj4.jpg

It's like she's obsessed with me.Could we please stop posting pictures of Mrs. s'news here?

[Ferrycrossthemersey]

Do not worry about so-called "dirty laundry" or going public. Do you have any idea how many anchors get "stalked"?

It's so common...and so awful, and so dangerous.

Please call the police...NOW.

[Another side]

Originally posted by LittleBabyPuppy:
And as a rule of thumb, NEVER put any kind of romantic letter in writing.I don't think I follow that.

[kydocking]

I knew a couple of female on-air types in my days that claimed to be stalked. No stalker ever surfaced. I also recall that in both cases the "stalkees" were
A. Not performing very well in their on-air roles
B. In a perpetual state of being in a "bad relationship" with their significant others.

Hmmmm. Makes you wonder.

[68-degrees]

So what if you and "ex" sent each other risque e-mails...it just shows you were both horny young lovers, completely crazy about each other...now, only one of you is still crazy.

Good luck with that, brother graemlins/cheers2.gif

[megamedia]

Thanks for the input..
Here's the latest...She contacted a management person at my station...badmouthing me..
I was put in contact with our media group security person. He suggested a strongly worded cease and desist letter describing her actions as criminal and stalking.
The company lawyer crafted a very blunt letter and sending it registered.
My guess is she will either back off or see it as game on. If that is the case, court will probably be next and a restraining order.

[ISTHISTHINGON?]

Waiting for a 'next' move will only end bad. Restraining order will at least embarrass her.
Have her arrested for harrassment.
Press charges.
By calling your station, she has shown her willingness to be vengeful. Next time it may not be as simple as a phone call to your station...vengeful people often step it up a notch if they don't get your attention. Trust me, I dated waaaaaay too many STRIPPERS in my life. I don't think there's any other advice that can be given to you that's not in the above comments from various posters.

[Clever Login Name]

Originally posted by s'news:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Clever Login Name:
I'm having the same problem.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/37/Lauren_Jones_zzcclj4.jpg

It's like she's obsessed with me.Could we please stop posting pictures of Mrs. s'news here?</font>[/QUOTE]Hey, at least I cropped out the part where she signed it for me.

[Crash Davis]

The next time the stalker is waiting for you at home:

1. Invite her inside.
2. Shoot her dead in the front entry.
3. Lock front door.
4. From outside, pry open door with crowbar.
5. Call police.
6. ??????
7. Profit!

[News Is Broken]

Originally posted by Crash Davis:
The next time the stalker is waiting for you at home:

1. Invite her inside.
2. Shoot her dead in the front entry.
3. Lock front door.
4. From outside, pry open door with crowbar.
5. Call police.
6. ??????
7. Profit!Yeah and when they find out that you staged the whole thing (and they will) you go down for premeditated murder. Farking brilliant.

I can't believe someone who purports himself to be an attorney would offer such horrible, horrible advice.

[Crash Davis]

Originally posted by News Is Broken:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Crash Davis:
The next time the stalker is waiting for you at home:

1. Invite her inside.
2. Shoot her dead in the front entry.
3. Lock front door.
4. From outside, pry open door with crowbar.
5. Call police.
6. ??????
7. Profit!Yeah and when they find out that you staged the whole thing (and they will) you go down for premeditated murder. Farking brilliant.

I can't believe someone who purports himself to be an attorney would offer such horrible, horrible advice.</font>[/QUOTE]My advice to you is to read this (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarcasm).

[tralala]

First off--just because he dated this person doesn't make it less serious that she's stalking him. I went through something similar--I didn't actually date the guy, but we were friends until the warning bells I heard faintly when we first met got loud enough to be scary.

Here's what you need to know--the stalking can go on for years because there's not much the police can do to stop it if the stalker's at all intelligent. This guy managed to get into my bank accounts (he didn't steal anything, just moved money around), e-mailed my employers with wild (and, of course, false) accusations, threatened to kill me. He would slash my tires, then magically appear going, "Oh Jane is that you? Wow, what happened, do you need a ride home?" He would call suicide hotlines (smart enough to know that 911 tapes calls) and claim I was going to kill myself so fire trucks and ambulances would show up at my door at all hours of the night. I can't even tell you the sick, ingenious stuff he came up with.

This all started in college. It finally stopped because of the banking nonsense, and he got 3 years for felony stalking. However, when he was just threatening to kill me, the police said they couldn't do anything. When he violated the restraining order I took out, the police said they couldn't do anything (because I couldn't prove it). When he somehow figured out my class schedule and enrolled in all the same classes, the police said it wasn't a violation because he had education rights, so they couldn't do anything.

Bad news, prison didn't fix it. I'm married now, all grown up, etc., and just when I think he's gone for good, he will send me a threatening e-mail or contact an employer.

And as for people apparently thinking the situation is somehow funnier when its happening to a man, I refer you to Phil Hartman...

[kycamman]

You should be armed at all times, tralala, and if the situation ever presents itself, you should take the sarcastic advice of the above poster and use it.

If someone that I sent to prison for three years for stalking suddenly showed back up in my life, I'd be worried.

[Ralphie the buffalo]

Originally posted by News Is Broken:
I can't believe someone who purports himself to be an attorney would offer such horrible, horrible advice.Then you will love this too:

Remember that roll of carpet sitting in the garage that you haven't gotten around to throwing away?

[miss hap]

I worked with a morning show news writer who for some reason knew how to get rid of a body with no traces. You plug a bath tub, put the body in, fill the tub with carburetor cleaner, let it sit and the body (bone and all) will turn into a gewy soup that simply slips down the drain when emptied.

I'm just sayin ...

[Tripe Face]

Originally posted by miss hap:
I worked with a morning show news writer who for some reason knew how to get rid of a body with no traces. You plug a bath tub, put the body in, fill the tub with carburetor cleaner, let it sit and the body (bone and all) will turn into a gewy soup that simply slips down the drain when emptied.

I'm just sayin ...Yea, first of all... if this were true, cops would be keeping an eye out for people buying 200 containers of STP.

If it really worked, why did Tony Soprano and Chrissy got to the trouble of choppin' up Raplhie if they could have just washed him down the drain.

Nah, the best place to get rid of a body is about 55 miles off the coast of Jersey. If Big Pussy doesn't turn up, your stalkers won't either.

[tralala]

Believe me, I've thought about it. Not as seriously as my husband has though! Fortunately we moved across country, so he limits himself to mainly being a cyber-nuisance these days. But I do get sick of explaining to new employers or any of the outlets I've written for that no, I did not hit his father with my car and, no, I did not put him in a wheelchair. And, no, they don't have to worry about him "going public" with the scandal. And, no, I never used to be a transvestite stripper.

Sigh.

Edited to add: Though if I had been, I would have been a damn good one! ;)

[ August 16, 2007, 12:23 PM: Message edited by: tralala ]

[Desert Rat]

Tralala,

Which one would you have been good at...

The transvestite or the stripper?... :D

[newz2me]

Nah, the best place to get rid of a body is about 55 miles off the coast of Jersey.Don't forget the Meadowlands ;)

[ August 16, 2007, 11:08 PM: Message edited by: newz2me ]

[Roy Hobbs]

I wouldn't worry much...Clint Eastwood made it clear that stalkers are more dangerous if you are in radio...
http://www.movieactors.com/photos-clint/clint130.jpeg